I told my friend I was asexual. She completely misunderstands what it means and won't listen when I try to explain. She also just keeps saying things like "you wouldn't know you're asexual." And that hurts. Especially because she says it around people I am not out to. I'm not aromantic. I'm pretty sure I'll have sex. I just don't experience sexual attraction or have a high drive for sex. She won't listen to that part of me.
I also identify as asexual, and I absolutely love physical contact and cuddling. I'm the type of person that you would see wandering the city streets with a "free hugs" sign, willingly embracing strangers for fun. Aces are truly all over the spectrum on this topic.
I'm asexual and I consider myself like most sexual people when it comes to physical contact. I'm uncomfortable when it involves strangers, a little awkward when it's people who I know but not very well, no opinion when it's friends but I still avoid it, and completely okay when it's best friends. I don't go around initiating hugs or anything, but this is my feelings on personal contact, and I always assumed most people were like this. So not all asexuals are completely uncomfortable with it.
What that last anon said applies to me so much. Pretty much all physical contact makes me incredibly uncomfortable. Is was wondering if an aversion to physical contact is common among asexuals...?
It’s hard to say really if something is common among aces, since so little is known and we are all so varied. However I am sure there are plenty of aces out there who are not comfortable with physical contact, just as I am sure there are many who are fine with it or even crave it.
No matter how you feel you are bound to find someone who feels the same way :)
I hate to be touched. I hate hate hate it. Hugs feel like an intrusion on my personal space, kisses are gross, and I get insanely neurotic if I'm poked, patted, or prodded in any way. There are only two or three (four at most) people who are allowed to touch me, and that's because they have my trust. With those people, I just can't seem to get enough hugs. An honest hug from me is the ultimate sign of trust.
My sexual best friend (whose engaged) and I have this inside joke where we call each other “mind lovers”. She’s one of the only people not to make negative comments about my asexuality. She gives me hope. :]
I’m an asexual in college. My best friend from high school — who also happens to be my long-term ex-girlfriend — came for a short visit and stayed in my apartment. Whilst there, she “lost her virginity,” so to speak, to my roommate. I don’t put much stock in the notion of virginity, but I’m glad she took this rare absence from her family home to explore her sexuality. And yet this was also an awkward reminder of the differences between the way I and most people experience relationships. I feel like an outsider all the time, and being asexual is definitely a part of that. Still, I can’t imagine being any other way….
Today I told my friend that I'm asexual, and she told me I should try having sex because it's something everyone should experience and that I should just try it, because I might like it. How am I supposed to even consider telling other people if this is the reception I'll get? I don't want to have sex, and I don't want my best friends doubting something so definite about myself. I don't want to tell anyone anymore, and yet I still want to tell everyone.
(Just want to tell the person who runs this blog that I love it. One day I'll tell my friends that I'm ace and I'll be able to reblog more. Until then I felt the need to anon message you. Thanks for running such a lovely blog!)
Thank you for your lovely message, I’m glad you like the blog.